I always try to keep an open line of communication with my kids. This is important to me, and I like to keep a tab on the music they listen to, the YouTube channels they watch, get to know their friends, and above all be a c o o l mom.
Contrarian by nature, and as a child growing up, I challenged the cultural, ethnic, and religious norms around me… I was a pain in the neck. My parents were typical of most Chinese immigrants, who arrived in the 50’s. My mom was a homemaker and didn’t work (but I do remember her doing the odd seamstress job at home), while my dad worked hard to provide a comfortable life for all of us. He was also an active evangelist and social activist within the Chinese community (hey it was the 60’s – the dawn of “isms”)- building the first Chinese Alliance Church in Toronto, as well as advocating for ethnic (Chinese) books in public libraries, as well as pushing for social services for Chinese elderly. What I remember most is the giving heart my parents had in opening our home to the Chinese Christian community. It is through my own dads unconditional love for those around him that I can understand the breathe and depth of Gods grace – love for me.
It was a long journey for me before I sought refuge in the grace of God. I remember leaving the Church and my family values – seeking instead to learn about life through all the post “isms” and leftist discourse I could experience, read and study. My own journey back to Jesus is marked with a long and winding road, very much like e a seed that falls along a pebbles path. It withers quickly under the glare of the sun.(1) Eventually I was able to plant my faith upon rich soil – my dads’ unconditional love for me guiding me to Jesus’ grace and mercy. The images of Jesus’ trek bearing a cross upon his shoulder, and a crown of thorn on his head, as his blood pour out of him is engraved in my minds eye. His blood with every step he takes cleanses me of my sin so that I can be lifted on high.
Now the cool mom in me, having been around the block a few times, want to protect my own children and shield them from the path of inequity. I want them to delight in walking with Jesus, without fear, knowing his precious grace, and his bountiful love – to know that at every turn, He is with them.
This includes sharing with them more unsavory parts of my life, along with an openness to leave a line of communication open to them, so that they can talk to me about anything – everything from the light, mundane to the more serious (profane).
Cool mom tries not to freak out – OK lets be honest – I occasionally do shriek and freak out big time, but thank goodness I can look to God to calm my soul, and strive to be non condemnation, and always seek restoration. This cool mom is not shy to speak about Jesus, talk about my own shortcomings, or discuss my need to seek forgiveness for my gutter mouth. This cool mom also listens to her 10 year old daughter when she reprimands me for using God’s name in vain – God bless her! I also listens to my son as he talks about the personal details of his friends and their lives. I try to not to freak out, or condemn, but listen. Yeah Listen! I bravely tell him to make a prayer list so that we can pray for them, and ask for the hand of God to enrich their lives with blessings.
Heck I am not perfect, but I am trying – remembering always my own faith is made stronger in the presence of Jesus Christ our Savior:
4 But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, 5 made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. 6
Ephesians 2:4-6a | NIV
Oh Lord give me the insight to be a good mom, to listen, and share with them my love of Jesus Christ.
1. 14 The farmer sows the word. 15 Some people are like seed along the path, where the word is sown. As soon as they hear it, Satan comes and takes away the word that was sown in them. 16 Others, like seed sown on rocky places, hear the word and at once receive it with joy. 17 But since they have no root, they last only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, they quickly fall away. 18 Still others, like seed sown among thorns, hear the word; 19 but the worries of this life, the deceitfulness of wealth and the desires for other things come in and choke the word, making it unfruitful. 20 Others, like seed sown on good soil, hear the word, accept it, and produce a crop—some thirty, some sixty, some a hundred times what was sown.”
Mark 4:14-20 | NIV